If chimps could fly, maybe something really would be done about air traffic chaos. But you have to trust his pulled-from-a-monkey’s-ass promises more than a celebrity chef’s vow to bail on a gig with an airline if his creations do not live up to their promise at 30,000 feet. How could a mega-caterer possibly screw up Nutella, grape jelly and brown banana on cardboard ciabatta any worse than its developer did in dreaming it up? It’s just lucky they don’t charge for airsickness bags yet.