Cool Whip bad. No, Cool Whip’s pie.

Eat Me Daily’s smart roundup of the Thanksgiving issues of all the food magazines missed the biggest turkey: Taste of Home. The cover has a desiccated bird stuffed under the skin with sage leaves that look disturbingly like either smashed butterflies or bad mold. It’s also accessorized with figs and champagne grapes, both staples of low-rent kitchens. Reader’s Digest deserves to be bankrupt after destroying one of the major charms of this weird little magazine by turning it into just one more magnet for advertising. My in-law equivalent has always subscribed for me for Christmas, and the best part of having her come visit the other week was showing her just how mutated it’s become so she can stop the madness. She got it, since she’s abandoning more and more of what she calls “books” because she can’t tell the stories from the shilling. Hellmann’s ad next to turkey sandwich story? Check. Party story wrapped around Chex ad? Done. Jimmy Dean sausage recipes designed just like readers’ clip-and-save cards? You betcha. Worst, someone really should have to eat leftovers with cranberry sauce every day until November for making readers confront Tyler Florence on every other page with Katie Brown in between. At least Bobby Hellmann was out of the picture.