Archive for May, 2013


May 2013

Wondered what “white pinot noir” might be.  Turns out it’s “unpretentious rosé.” Or, the new white zinfandel. // First thing you learn when reporting on the bog on cranberries is that the people who produce them are adamantly not farmers but growers. // New rule: restaurant designers should have to eat a meal in every seat they cram in. (Walked out o’Fat Radish rather than face wall off bar.) // @DwightGarner read this memoir so we don’t have to. Ouch, to put it mildly. // Just found this Aldo Leopold: Humans are like the “potato bug, which exterminated the potato and thereby exterminated itself.” // Cheese: When it’s not snobbish indulgence of the elites, it’s junk food for the poors.  // Sometimes you can only tell mango by the color. // And the best dairy name ever has to be: SoyCow SoyMilk. (Video should show udders on the beans.)

What is the sound of one towel snapping?

May 2013

Someone needs to alert Panchito: No one wants his “lessons.” We’re still trying to unlearn the last one. The inestimable Charlie Pierce deserves a Pulitzer for this observation alone: Sportswriters have been accused of selling out for a steak dinner, but “you can buy the Washington press corps with a cheap nickname.”

Muslin hummus

May 2013

Every morning I wake up to some new set of links to food start-ups that are hoping to do good by doing well. And I wish them more than well, since I’m a big believer in food as the solution to all problems. So I was encouraged to read that vulture capitalists are starting to put their mega-money where their big mouths are. But someone is really going to have to answer why they would invest in the type of companies that are trying to come up with substitutes for nature’s most nearly perfect food. They might as well be attempting to develop a fat-free avocado. The other half of breakfast at least made sense, since even vegans lust for bacon.

Cain enabled

May 2013

I heard a fair amount of sad chuckling after the Newtown massacre over the confusion between the two NRAs. The fud one, of course, was perceived as the innocuous lobby. But an oddly combative interview on Lenny, and a flurry of publicity for the book,   made me realize again that very few pimps pimp for noble causes. You can hurt people with unregulated guns & ammo but also with laws that keep wages at a Bangladesh-in-the-USA level ($2.31 an hour, FFS?) Uzbekistanstan, indeed.

Like white on Ricin

May 2013

Relatedly, I saw much hooraying over the return of Twinkies etc. but almost no awareness in the fud world that the whole brouhaha was yet another greedy/bogus “Mission Accomplished,” given that the goal was to destroy the unions, loot the company and let it be reincarnated as a Bangladesh-in-the-USA enterprise. Enjoy your fresh Ho Hos. Just don’t stop to wonder if there’s any blood in the Sno Balls.


May 2013

Tweezers are fine cooking’s way of saying: Slow down, you’re eating too fast. // I misread Pollan as Palin and thought Monty Python was back with a cheese nun sketch. // Cheerleaders are trouble. // With fish, baked is another way of saying fucked. // “Fat kebabs sweating on spits” would put you off your Istanbul dinner. // So scrapple is the new lard? (Sorry. Does not compute.) // Flair/flare is the new palate/palette. // Not even 1 1/2 shades of grey. // And guess we have to wait 60 years to hear the Chimp’s taster come clean. Although that poor woman would have been restricted to pretzels and hot dogs, not asparagus and pasta.

Also, too, I started to post this but thought better of it, given the loons loose on the series of tubes: “Instead of trying to save the ducks (as if), these people should get (mental) help for themselves.” Considering I was uncharacteristically too timid to Tweet, I’d say terrorism works.

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